On the Swings Again

My mood has been up and down a lot lately. On the one hand, things have been going very well. On the other hand, I've been really conscious of all my social failures. I feel unloved, worry that I'm unlovable. Sometimes I wish I could be alone without feeling lonely, and then I feel guilty about that.

Objectively, things are better, not worse. I guess one way to look at it is that I'm doing a much worse job of ignoring my long-term problems. While that's not totally a bad thing, it still feels pretty awful.

I'm all right, though. Things are all right.